Each and every day i'm trying. Not too bad, but there is definitely room for improvement. It has been on my mind for some time. How to juggle my time, how not to let the busy-ness get into me and how to spend each and everyday with Him and not get sucked into the cycle of meeting Him only on weekends.
It is tough. He did not promise it will be easy. And it is tougher that every action of yours will be scrutinised, that every action will be matched up to a preconceived standard. Yet this perspective is new and definitely helps change me. Just the imagery of Jesus sitting beside me and listening to what I say in my every day life is really strong. I become more aware of myself, of how I'm conducting myself and it is almost like a constant reminder to live a life glorifying Him and not of the flesh.
Someone asked - is there free will in Christianity. Yes, there is. He gave us the option to choose to accept Him or not. Yet, for all that He has done for me, I am willing to give up my freedom and submit to His ways. Its like when you're in a relationship with someone, you'd just give up certain things, all out of love. Therefore, I am trying to change.
I am not perfect. Please do correct me anytime. i need correction.
Think through...
efficiency efficiency. i need lots of that.
anw had a great sharing today. just feel so different but i guess cos we're all nearly the same age we can clique and understand each others' struggles. Actually i've come to a point of forgetting their ages ha
had a talk with someone. just felt that to understand fully what to do in future, the purpose of your life, the crux is to find out the truth and then you can fix the other stuff.
like when i was in yr 1, i struggled with my purpose, my being; was not even sure if what i was doing what i was believing in is real. Yet i know if i didnt find out, no matter how stressed by the exams was, i couldnt continue on with my life, with living. Cos living will be so meaningless. I knew myself. I'm that kinda of person that will not rest till i make sense of something bothering me. So i'd never be at peace if i didnt find out the truth. The truth might not be as it turns out to be, or i hoped to be, but i knew at that point of time, i needed an answer to carry on with living. And yes, i am glad i found the answer.
It doesn't really matter what answer you get, but i guess we cannot just stay in a state that we just be through each and every day not being fully sure of what we are doing, what our purpose is. Mindless pursuits are just so ridiculous. You have to know where you're heading to, to have a stand. Even if you may not be right i guess.
And yes, i fully agree with my friend. Every moment, every second in life can never be repeated. And we may think we might meet the person again, yet you might never know. And the sphere of people that we each meet are different so it makes us all unique in a sense and no one can fulfill that niche of speaking to others other than you. For example, i guess im the only one who knows person A in that place where person B brought me to and person B doesn't even know person A. i mean all these links are so complex and so intriguing. It is a wonder how each of us are connected, how the way we're connected with other people is also unique.
And we will never know what happens the next day. We dunno if we'd wake up to another day. So live each day as it is the only chance for you to do something. Only then do we appreciate the opportunities we have, the people we meet and to speak to them.
Someone posted me this question. Thought it was really interesting. I have my answer, but have you gotten yours? The question's like this: when you die, and you were to see someone standing in front of you, how confident you are of who He is? will it be the god you worship, or are you not even sure of it? For me the answer is clear. I am very confident that when I die, i'd meet God. no doubts about that.
basically the question is: what is the truth?
The truth may hurt now, but do not let it hurt you forever. seek the truth, do not avoid.
There can only be but one truth. An apple will always be an apple no matter how you call it. it can appear as different forms but there is only one fruit that is an apple. you can have a fruit that looks similar eg nectarine but it'd never be an apple.
There can never be multiple truths cos if there is multiple, it isn't a truth anymore. By definition of Oxford dictionary, true = in accordance with fact or reality / genuine / exact / accurate. So with such precision, there can only be one truth.
Teachers' day today. wow. i guess it not only celebrates the contribution by the school teachers. I guess everyone can be a teacher, if we so want - in different aspects of life. And yes, this day is the start of a month of prayer.
salvation. Hmmm interesting note here. what is salvation in Christianity? will you go to heaven just because you are "christian" or so called accepted Christ? Accepting Christ is but just a belief that there is Christ, and you wants Him to come into your life. that is just the beginning. Yet do you go to heaven just because of this? no. not really. satan knows God, he fears and trembles at His name, but is he saved just because he believed? NO NO NO! It is how you live your life. satan knows that there is a God. but he does not live a Christ-like life. he is only out to destroy. So for anyone who thinks that you're saved just cos you are a Christian, it is absolutely not true. If you do not repent of your ways, do not change and continue to sin, then you're no different from satan and his angels.
And definitely, there can be no human effort to reach Him. there has to be His grace.
Keeping my eyes fixed on Him! And tarry not, there is no time to waste!
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Saturday, August 16, 2008
MEDAL FOR SINGAPORE!!!! TABLE TENNIS ROX
Ha well other nations have it easy. They can almost predict whether they can get the next gold medal. (think: P-H-E-L-P-S ha) But for Singapore, its been a wait for 48 years! I watched the match. Yes, it was nearly 4 hours long, so much so that they had to shorten the time and limit the number of strokes by each player in the last game. But yet under such pressure, our dear Feng Tianwei had nerves of steel and battled on valiantly. Ha and the doubles was good too! i mean before that they say we've never beaten the Korean doubles, but now we actually won! Woo hoo! Well done ne!
If you look at all the statistics etc, you'd have predicted that Singapore could win. After all, we are seeded second. Yet, i guess for a nation who's never gotten so near to the podium in nearly half a century, if u're the ones representing the nation, you'd too have dropped ranking from 1 to 100. I mean like so much pressure so much expectations how to stay calm right? At least for me, the non participant, i just could not sit still. i was shouting, cheering, clapping, booing, banging hands and legs, jumping around at each stroke of the tie breaking match between Feng and Park. Oh man. I told me fren that my heart just came out lah! So yups, here's the moment to savour:
and this being just after National Day sounds so apt.
And i was very emotional after they won. Nearly had tears of joy. ha But can you imagine if you're them?
HA finally, please do remember to tune in to Channel U at 7.30pm on Sunday for the finals against China!
Sidenote: i really wonder how PM Lee can deliver his national day speech on sunday when our nation's on our way to try get a GOLD! Oh man, think no one will be watching his speech lor, and those in the auditorium will be wanting to leave. For all you know halfway during his speech they'd screen updates ha. Ha i tink PM Lee also can't concentrate leh! Even Mr Teo Chee Hean was in Beijing today to support them lah!
For me, i guess the silver is good enough. *contented* But you know, as humans we're all greedy. Once you have the silver, you'd want the gold. ha. If there is this slight chance, we'd still wish for a GOLD, no matter how strong China team seems.
me in great anticipation... cham think will be thinking of the finals the whole weekend!
WELL DONE SINGAPORE! WELL DONE LI JIAWEI, WANG YUEGU, FENG TIAN WEI. You gals rox!
P/S: Why aren't these people working?
cos its the olympics!
... and people aren't studying too!
like me! MUHAHAHA
tata
If you look at all the statistics etc, you'd have predicted that Singapore could win. After all, we are seeded second. Yet, i guess for a nation who's never gotten so near to the podium in nearly half a century, if u're the ones representing the nation, you'd too have dropped ranking from 1 to 100. I mean like so much pressure so much expectations how to stay calm right? At least for me, the non participant, i just could not sit still. i was shouting, cheering, clapping, booing, banging hands and legs, jumping around at each stroke of the tie breaking match between Feng and Park. Oh man. I told me fren that my heart just came out lah! So yups, here's the moment to savour:
and this being just after National Day sounds so apt.
And i was very emotional after they won. Nearly had tears of joy. ha But can you imagine if you're them?
HA finally, please do remember to tune in to Channel U at 7.30pm on Sunday for the finals against China!
Sidenote: i really wonder how PM Lee can deliver his national day speech on sunday when our nation's on our way to try get a GOLD! Oh man, think no one will be watching his speech lor, and those in the auditorium will be wanting to leave. For all you know halfway during his speech they'd screen updates ha. Ha i tink PM Lee also can't concentrate leh! Even Mr Teo Chee Hean was in Beijing today to support them lah!
For me, i guess the silver is good enough. *contented* But you know, as humans we're all greedy. Once you have the silver, you'd want the gold. ha. If there is this slight chance, we'd still wish for a GOLD, no matter how strong China team seems.
me in great anticipation... cham think will be thinking of the finals the whole weekend!
WELL DONE SINGAPORE! WELL DONE LI JIAWEI, WANG YUEGU, FENG TIAN WEI. You gals rox!
P/S: Why aren't these people working?
cos its the olympics!
... and people aren't studying too!
like me! MUHAHAHA
tata
Friday, August 15, 2008
My dear feedback
RRRRRrrrrr
Ok but yeah, now im physically filling up the feedback forms in the hospital. Our dear university has downgraded itself in terms of technology. I can fully understand why they're doing this, but I just need to complain... for a while.
The feedback forms for our tutors used to be online. So we just have to gain access to the internet and then we just click click click and we're done. But ya, students being students, they always ignore what the administration tells them to do. So the feedback rate is as low as 20% in some rotations. As feedback is so important in judging the *&^^%#&*%($$ given to the hospitals, they need a high feedback rate. So to ensure that all of us do it, they've downgraded the whole system of feedback to the paper system again. so all of us have to use our pen and fill up SHEETS of feedback forms. Waste ink, waste paper, waste time. Seriously, i type faster than i write lah!
Sigh...
just some complaints....
but oh wells on the brighter note. TABLE TENNIS WOMENS SEMIFINALS SINGAPORE VS SOUTH KOREA!!!! coming up. i hope they win
Ok but yeah, now im physically filling up the feedback forms in the hospital. Our dear university has downgraded itself in terms of technology. I can fully understand why they're doing this, but I just need to complain... for a while.
The feedback forms for our tutors used to be online. So we just have to gain access to the internet and then we just click click click and we're done. But ya, students being students, they always ignore what the administration tells them to do. So the feedback rate is as low as 20% in some rotations. As feedback is so important in judging the *&^^%#&*%($$ given to the hospitals, they need a high feedback rate. So to ensure that all of us do it, they've downgraded the whole system of feedback to the paper system again. so all of us have to use our pen and fill up SHEETS of feedback forms. Waste ink, waste paper, waste time. Seriously, i type faster than i write lah!
Sigh...
just some complaints....
but oh wells on the brighter note. TABLE TENNIS WOMENS SEMIFINALS SINGAPORE VS SOUTH KOREA!!!! coming up. i hope they win
Tough, Sombre but True.
The title suggests it. These videos are titled "the immoral generation"
Part1
Part 2
Well, Just felt that we should all reflect upon these issues and not leave it hanging. Face it, not avoid it, and change.
Part1
Part 2
Well, Just felt that we should all reflect upon these issues and not leave it hanging. Face it, not avoid it, and change.
Monday, August 11, 2008
Breaking the walls of my Igloo and walk right into the cold, bringing the only warmth - LOVE - to the unknown snow capped land
I have never been so impressed. She has really opened my eyes to many things which I have not seen or thought about before. As what V would say, "You have really challenged me." I have never seen that kind of love radiating out from somebody. I have never seen that kind of expressivity, that kind of love and concern, emulating that perfect love of the Lord.
I find myself pale in comparison. Now I find my own ideals and purpose put to shame.
Face it, boy! You have always been dreaming, been a dreamer, just thinking about things but never really doing it. Or rather, you have always not been able to walk out of that box. At most, you have only walked to the door, facing the world outside briefly and returning back to your box.
It is time to wake up and inject some energy and enthusiasm in my life! I have been stagnant for so long. In fact at times, the water has flowed back from where it started.
I am not so high and mighty. I am only a small fry. Yet, not matter how small a fry I am, as long as I don upon the love of the Lord, people will be touched.
I realised that how un-expressive I am. I find it difficult to express my feelings, to show my concern, to verbalise the real thoughts I have inside. It is always suppressed. I may seem like a joyful, loud person, but I am only an empty vessel. I make the most noise over small things which I have done. Yet I come to realise, that I should learn to be less noisy and fill up my vessel. But now I know, how it is to express concern, how to make your thoughts into action.
I must say I am really impressed.
I guess I have always put a wall around myself. This wall is built up through years of experience in this world. The wall was set up to protect myself - from cheats, etc - so that if anyone wanted to, they could not hurt me.
Yet it is time for me to break down this thick wall. I have seen how this wall has stopped me short of reaching out to others, to showing my genuine concern. I have seen how someone who's not afraid of being cheated, being taken advantage of, can touch many others.
All the things I have thought of and wanted to do, but not done - W did it. I always tell myself "one day... one day i'd do it... now the circumstances do not allow it... my *** will do *** etc etc... the time will come..." but I have realised two things. One, the famous saying: "time and tide waits for no man." Two, be proactive and lift your butt off the seat and get things done! No use talking!
And yes, I often wonder why do others have so much time, yet I seem to always be struggling with time. I really need some planning. I really need to make myself more efficient.
Mark my words. No matter how tongue tied I am, how uncomfortable i get when talking to others, showing my general concern, I will try.
Shall see where He leads me. Revelation in the process...
I will try to love as how God loved us. I cannot love every single one in the world. But He can. And I will try... May Your love flow through me!
I have wasted another day. But i shall waste it no more... There is so much to be done, yet the workers are few.
I will work hard in breaking this wall!
I find myself pale in comparison. Now I find my own ideals and purpose put to shame.
Face it, boy! You have always been dreaming, been a dreamer, just thinking about things but never really doing it. Or rather, you have always not been able to walk out of that box. At most, you have only walked to the door, facing the world outside briefly and returning back to your box.
It is time to wake up and inject some energy and enthusiasm in my life! I have been stagnant for so long. In fact at times, the water has flowed back from where it started.
I am not so high and mighty. I am only a small fry. Yet, not matter how small a fry I am, as long as I don upon the love of the Lord, people will be touched.
I realised that how un-expressive I am. I find it difficult to express my feelings, to show my concern, to verbalise the real thoughts I have inside. It is always suppressed. I may seem like a joyful, loud person, but I am only an empty vessel. I make the most noise over small things which I have done. Yet I come to realise, that I should learn to be less noisy and fill up my vessel. But now I know, how it is to express concern, how to make your thoughts into action.
I must say I am really impressed.
I guess I have always put a wall around myself. This wall is built up through years of experience in this world. The wall was set up to protect myself - from cheats, etc - so that if anyone wanted to, they could not hurt me.
Yet it is time for me to break down this thick wall. I have seen how this wall has stopped me short of reaching out to others, to showing my genuine concern. I have seen how someone who's not afraid of being cheated, being taken advantage of, can touch many others.
All the things I have thought of and wanted to do, but not done - W did it. I always tell myself "one day... one day i'd do it... now the circumstances do not allow it... my *** will do *** etc etc... the time will come..." but I have realised two things. One, the famous saying: "time and tide waits for no man." Two, be proactive and lift your butt off the seat and get things done! No use talking!
And yes, I often wonder why do others have so much time, yet I seem to always be struggling with time. I really need some planning. I really need to make myself more efficient.
Mark my words. No matter how tongue tied I am, how uncomfortable i get when talking to others, showing my general concern, I will try.
Shall see where He leads me. Revelation in the process...
I will try to love as how God loved us. I cannot love every single one in the world. But He can. And I will try... May Your love flow through me!
I have wasted another day. But i shall waste it no more... There is so much to be done, yet the workers are few.
I will work hard in breaking this wall!
Saturday, August 09, 2008
Happy National Day + Olympics! WOOO!
hur hur hur... its time for some patriotism! Its national day! ha nope never had the habit of rushing for the tickets to try to get a glimpse of the national day parade, but without fail every year, my family will gather at my grandma's home for a curry chicken feast and watch the parade! Don't know how it all started, but yups, that is the usual practice every year since i was born. Guess national day is not just a day for us to come and remember the contributions of our forefathers, to look back at the hard work of Singaporeans and how fare we've come. It is also a day for the family to get together, to remember how important our family is.
For our dear foreign friends reading this post, you probably do not know much about Singapore. Here's some info! Love wikipedia haha:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Singapore
and http://www.visitsingapore.com/publish/stbportal/en/index.html
erhms and now its olympics time!!! Ha dunno why everytime olympics i get so excited! already have in mind what i intend to watch! Yups love sports ne! ha tink i am getting abit ga ga over the olympics. even subscribed to sms alerts to results of team singapore's performance! (ha free lah) haha so even though i cant watch i'd know how fellow singaporeans r doing! ha hope can catch the badminton games la! badminton leh! susilo rox ha just try ur best la ha if u too wanna catch our team's performance, go to: http://www.teamsingapore.com.sg/publish/teamsingapore/en/games/Olympics/Beijing2008.html
k enuf crap. back to studying... :s
For our dear foreign friends reading this post, you probably do not know much about Singapore. Here's some info! Love wikipedia haha:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Singapore
and http://www.visitsingapore.com/publish/stbportal/en/index.html
erhms and now its olympics time!!! Ha dunno why everytime olympics i get so excited! already have in mind what i intend to watch! Yups love sports ne! ha tink i am getting abit ga ga over the olympics. even subscribed to sms alerts to results of team singapore's performance! (ha free lah) haha so even though i cant watch i'd know how fellow singaporeans r doing! ha hope can catch the badminton games la! badminton leh! susilo rox ha just try ur best la ha if u too wanna catch our team's performance, go to: http://www.teamsingapore.com.sg/publish/teamsingapore/en/games/Olympics/Beijing2008.html
k enuf crap. back to studying... :s
The Floppy Infant
Once again, this might be an emo post. Guess i'd only pen down the more emo stuff usually. So beware...
Starting my revision postings... We've to build up the exam mood, we're trying to race against time to see as many cases as possible, so much so that we plunge into case after case. Yet, caution! Take a step back, take a moment to reflect...
As I look at them, i'm reminded of why i had wanted to do paediatrics. Helpless, powerless are they. A whole life ahead of them, yet just one irresponsible parent, just one stroke of bad luck, just one infection, they'd be a dependent for the rest of their lives...
Have seen a very cute baby during tut. Did all the necessary examination, thought he was normal, except probably his occiput was flatter than usual. Yet when we looked at the MRI, i realised, he might remain that "cute" forever... Development will be impaired, especially of the brain. Intelligence, motor function, personal social, might not advance any more. His brain might compensate, might rewire, or it might not. How true the saying is: what is done, cannot be undone.
Who then will help these helpless ones?
***
I always think that we are held responsible for the gifts God has given us. If u're given more, you're expected to use more of what you have (blessings, gifts etc) to help others who have less. It is a fair system. So perhaps, it is better to be less smart? At least there'd be less responsibility ha.
***
so anyway, i'd see where He leads me...
Starting my revision postings... We've to build up the exam mood, we're trying to race against time to see as many cases as possible, so much so that we plunge into case after case. Yet, caution! Take a step back, take a moment to reflect...
As I look at them, i'm reminded of why i had wanted to do paediatrics. Helpless, powerless are they. A whole life ahead of them, yet just one irresponsible parent, just one stroke of bad luck, just one infection, they'd be a dependent for the rest of their lives...
Have seen a very cute baby during tut. Did all the necessary examination, thought he was normal, except probably his occiput was flatter than usual. Yet when we looked at the MRI, i realised, he might remain that "cute" forever... Development will be impaired, especially of the brain. Intelligence, motor function, personal social, might not advance any more. His brain might compensate, might rewire, or it might not. How true the saying is: what is done, cannot be undone.
Who then will help these helpless ones?
***
I always think that we are held responsible for the gifts God has given us. If u're given more, you're expected to use more of what you have (blessings, gifts etc) to help others who have less. It is a fair system. So perhaps, it is better to be less smart? At least there'd be less responsibility ha.
***
so anyway, i'd see where He leads me...
Sunday, July 27, 2008
RaMbLinGs of the UnStEaDy, SlEep DePriVED MiND
Work has been quite interesting thus far. But yet, sometimes it sets me thinking.
Where there are people, there will be politics, there will be interpersonal relationships to handle. For those who know me, hmmm i think deep inside me i really do not know how to handle such things. Or rather i do not like to handle such things. But i guess i just have to learn. Things are no longer as simple in school, where everyone's a student and everyone is just helping everyone, with that occasional gossip just for the fun of it.
I feel like i am learning ballet everyday. I tiptoe everyday, just to make sure i don't step on others' toes. Yet, with such a fat and clumsy ballerina like me, i am unable to keep that tiptoe and land my big fat foot heavily on others' toes. And such things tire me. And realise how important it is to have a friend or fellow colleague in the same shoes to share your thoughts, if not i think i'd become a mad ballerina.
Yes, the ballerina dances best during the solo dance, when she can just leap and fly and split without thinking of stepping on others' toes.
I thought i was used to being the odd one out in Uganda, being the "celebrity" getting all the stares and attention, when every action of yours will be scrutinised. Yet, back here, its the same. Don't like that feeling i guess. But no choice. I don't like to do things or trying to do things just to "show someone that i am capable, i can do stuff". I might have used to be like that when i was still a teen, but nah definitely not now. I just want to do my own stuff. Don't disturb me.
Am i simple or am i too complicated? Sometimes i find myself not knowing how to respond to a certain person/action. I find myself lacking a character. When i just do not know how to behave, i'd just smile in a silly manner. Or rather, i find alot of things funny that people don't find it funny and i can't control myself. All my expressions are on my face. I feel so transparent. But yups, though i can act, i have learnt more and more how to be true to myself and not act. Feel that I have been peeling off that layers and layers of covering over me during these few years.
Take for eg i went to this _____ store to buy drink with my fren. Cos my fren was paying first and i passed him some money for my drink, he wanted to pass me his 5 cents coinS. Ha so u know my usual reaction is.... "huh don't want la. they will definitely give you change then you just pass me the change" in Mandarin. Then this cashier suddenly burst out (in mandarin, towards me): "don't think i don't understand what you are talking about. I can speak chinese, malay, english, tamil" and then to prove it she said things in all the 4 official languages. Ha so you know i was at first like ??? i wasn't even talking to / about you, you're saying this. Then later the first thought that entered my mind was that (cos i was in a psy ward) could she be an escapee fr the ward? then i burst out laughing but tried to control. then she got more pissed. sigh i mean i dun mean to make anybody angry or wat but it just happens. Out of my control, when i try to be the person that i am. Ha many incidents worse / like this la. but yups i don't really care actually, but u know when u're working, things really turn out better if u are able to handle such things. u'd rather have a (N_r _E) fill in the blanks that can help u do ur stuff rather than one who'd even say durin resus "i cant do chest compressions" and just stand there, when everyone else is busy.
Well this week when i fully get involved in the care of my pt, i invested more emotions into it and yes, i end up worse.
all in one day:
1) anaemia workup ---- result: malignant gastric ulcer
2) came for gastroenteritis, +ve salmonella - did chest xray - noticed large lung lesion on upper lobe - had chronic cough, was advised years ago to do surg for lung but defaulted - +ve for Tuberculosis in sputum (more layman term la, so u all can understand) - CT scan shows multiple lesions in lung and liver. Cancer vs TB.
3) Liver nodule for biospy - hepatocellular carcinoma ie liver cancer
my reg was breaking all these bad news all within the same round. of course, he's good, he's experienced. he has done it so many times its impersonal. or rather, he sees the patients once a day during that short less-than-one-hour round he doesn't really know them. it could be the way he put it. After he said it to the patients, they were like: "uh huh..." but i wonder when the message really sets in, how will they feel. there's one that felt like nothing had happened and even loudly said bye and thanked us when he was to be transferred to another ward.
but as he broke the bad news, my heart was breaking...
1) this nice affable old man. always so tolerant to the pokes i make in his arms. always thanking us. just admitted for giddiness, had long term anaemia already, but yet...
2) this guy is mid forties, ONLY CAME IN FOR GE, so healthy and strong, so friendly, yet...
3) well this guy has the lowest pain threshold, always hurling verbal abuses at me and others cos we couldnt get that IV plug in... always... until today... last time i was abit scared cos he'd wail and wail till the whole ward can hear when i poke in that needle. now i just let him... i really dun mind, i wont feel unhappy, i wont take it against him. he has all the reason to do so and i fully understand. so when he was hurling all his !@#$$$%$#@! at me during plug setting (post call mind u) i really just let him and tried to be as gentle. then the cleaner also couldn't stand it and scolded him for me but i just kept quiet, let him continue. i prayed to God, to let me get this plug in once and for all and not add to his pain. I did it. oh well, He did it. i just finished it and left, but while throwing my sharps, i teared. am not sure why... felt adamant about his comments? nope. but definitely thankful for the Lord for helping me in my procedures. felt sad for him? maybe... but i definitely do not want the cleaner to be arguing with the patient... i mean i don't think he deserved to be treated like that, yet the cleaner was doing it for me indirectly.... he is a difficult patient but i mean when someone's potentially terminally ill, u wouldnt really want him to live his remaining days being at odds with all the nurses and ah-ma and cleaners in the ward. i know he makes unfair demands, but should we as HCWs just pay lip service to him? hmmm...
i am not sure why in just half a ward u can have 3 potentially terminally ill patients... all discovered in one day. and its abit overwhelming.
someone made the passing comment that the newsbreaker was like an "angel of death" and they laughed. yes, i couldnt believe it that i actually smiled at that joke. only to realise how wrong i was, how bad i was.. at the next moment. i am guilty for being such an impersonal HCW, just like the rest.
I don't want myself to turn impersonal but yet, at the same time i know, if i put too much emotions, it'd be real draining for me.
but oh wells.... i know i can draw strength from the Lord. When i am weak, He is strong...
post call... as usual cant sleep in broad daylight but yet cant do anything... the call was tiring but ok la i guess.... yet, another politiking thingy... wateva...
Where there are people, there will be politics, there will be interpersonal relationships to handle. For those who know me, hmmm i think deep inside me i really do not know how to handle such things. Or rather i do not like to handle such things. But i guess i just have to learn. Things are no longer as simple in school, where everyone's a student and everyone is just helping everyone, with that occasional gossip just for the fun of it.
I feel like i am learning ballet everyday. I tiptoe everyday, just to make sure i don't step on others' toes. Yet, with such a fat and clumsy ballerina like me, i am unable to keep that tiptoe and land my big fat foot heavily on others' toes. And such things tire me. And realise how important it is to have a friend or fellow colleague in the same shoes to share your thoughts, if not i think i'd become a mad ballerina.
Yes, the ballerina dances best during the solo dance, when she can just leap and fly and split without thinking of stepping on others' toes.
I thought i was used to being the odd one out in Uganda, being the "celebrity" getting all the stares and attention, when every action of yours will be scrutinised. Yet, back here, its the same. Don't like that feeling i guess. But no choice. I don't like to do things or trying to do things just to "show someone that i am capable, i can do stuff". I might have used to be like that when i was still a teen, but nah definitely not now. I just want to do my own stuff. Don't disturb me.
Am i simple or am i too complicated? Sometimes i find myself not knowing how to respond to a certain person/action. I find myself lacking a character. When i just do not know how to behave, i'd just smile in a silly manner. Or rather, i find alot of things funny that people don't find it funny and i can't control myself. All my expressions are on my face. I feel so transparent. But yups, though i can act, i have learnt more and more how to be true to myself and not act. Feel that I have been peeling off that layers and layers of covering over me during these few years.
Take for eg i went to this _____ store to buy drink with my fren. Cos my fren was paying first and i passed him some money for my drink, he wanted to pass me his 5 cents coinS. Ha so u know my usual reaction is.... "huh don't want la. they will definitely give you change then you just pass me the change" in Mandarin. Then this cashier suddenly burst out (in mandarin, towards me): "don't think i don't understand what you are talking about. I can speak chinese, malay, english, tamil" and then to prove it she said things in all the 4 official languages. Ha so you know i was at first like ??? i wasn't even talking to / about you, you're saying this. Then later the first thought that entered my mind was that (cos i was in a psy ward) could she be an escapee fr the ward? then i burst out laughing but tried to control. then she got more pissed. sigh i mean i dun mean to make anybody angry or wat but it just happens. Out of my control, when i try to be the person that i am. Ha many incidents worse / like this la. but yups i don't really care actually, but u know when u're working, things really turn out better if u are able to handle such things. u'd rather have a (N_r _E) fill in the blanks that can help u do ur stuff rather than one who'd even say durin resus "i cant do chest compressions" and just stand there, when everyone else is busy.
Well this week when i fully get involved in the care of my pt, i invested more emotions into it and yes, i end up worse.
all in one day:
1) anaemia workup ---- result: malignant gastric ulcer
2) came for gastroenteritis, +ve salmonella - did chest xray - noticed large lung lesion on upper lobe - had chronic cough, was advised years ago to do surg for lung but defaulted - +ve for Tuberculosis in sputum (more layman term la, so u all can understand) - CT scan shows multiple lesions in lung and liver. Cancer vs TB.
3) Liver nodule for biospy - hepatocellular carcinoma ie liver cancer
my reg was breaking all these bad news all within the same round. of course, he's good, he's experienced. he has done it so many times its impersonal. or rather, he sees the patients once a day during that short less-than-one-hour round he doesn't really know them. it could be the way he put it. After he said it to the patients, they were like: "uh huh..." but i wonder when the message really sets in, how will they feel. there's one that felt like nothing had happened and even loudly said bye and thanked us when he was to be transferred to another ward.
but as he broke the bad news, my heart was breaking...
1) this nice affable old man. always so tolerant to the pokes i make in his arms. always thanking us. just admitted for giddiness, had long term anaemia already, but yet...
2) this guy is mid forties, ONLY CAME IN FOR GE, so healthy and strong, so friendly, yet...
3) well this guy has the lowest pain threshold, always hurling verbal abuses at me and others cos we couldnt get that IV plug in... always... until today... last time i was abit scared cos he'd wail and wail till the whole ward can hear when i poke in that needle. now i just let him... i really dun mind, i wont feel unhappy, i wont take it against him. he has all the reason to do so and i fully understand. so when he was hurling all his !@#$$$%$#@! at me during plug setting (post call mind u) i really just let him and tried to be as gentle. then the cleaner also couldn't stand it and scolded him for me but i just kept quiet, let him continue. i prayed to God, to let me get this plug in once and for all and not add to his pain. I did it. oh well, He did it. i just finished it and left, but while throwing my sharps, i teared. am not sure why... felt adamant about his comments? nope. but definitely thankful for the Lord for helping me in my procedures. felt sad for him? maybe... but i definitely do not want the cleaner to be arguing with the patient... i mean i don't think he deserved to be treated like that, yet the cleaner was doing it for me indirectly.... he is a difficult patient but i mean when someone's potentially terminally ill, u wouldnt really want him to live his remaining days being at odds with all the nurses and ah-ma and cleaners in the ward. i know he makes unfair demands, but should we as HCWs just pay lip service to him? hmmm...
i am not sure why in just half a ward u can have 3 potentially terminally ill patients... all discovered in one day. and its abit overwhelming.
someone made the passing comment that the newsbreaker was like an "angel of death" and they laughed. yes, i couldnt believe it that i actually smiled at that joke. only to realise how wrong i was, how bad i was.. at the next moment. i am guilty for being such an impersonal HCW, just like the rest.
I don't want myself to turn impersonal but yet, at the same time i know, if i put too much emotions, it'd be real draining for me.
but oh wells.... i know i can draw strength from the Lord. When i am weak, He is strong...
post call... as usual cant sleep in broad daylight but yet cant do anything... the call was tiring but ok la i guess.... yet, another politiking thingy... wateva...
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Updates...
Coming to the 3rd of the 4 weeks of SIP (student internship programme) part I, at TTSH. Yes, definitely, i've learnt more about being a junior doctor than any time during my previous 4 yrs.
Yet, once again (same as for Uganda), to me, the highlight of these 4 wks is non-medical. I don't deny that being thrown into the wards acting as a house officer has been an immense change, have learnt stuff that i've never learnt before. BUT what has been greater is the spiritual growth that I've been having ever since i started to be able to go to church.
Breath-taking, amazing, awe-ful are just some words that can describe a small proportion of the whole experience. Nowadays, if i don't go church on sundays, there seems to be something missing from me. Due to work commitments, i'd go for saturday service, yet it doesnt feel the same.
Hmmm maybe i shouldn't call it spiritual growth / maturity yet. Cos true maturity is when the your life is transformed. When the character of Jesus manifests in us. So yes, i still do admit my transformation is kinda slow. But the spiritual experience is really amazing.
Sometimes i just have this chong1 dong4 to put down everything on my hands and hide in some corner and just read His word, spend time with Him and fellowshipping with others. Yet, i know, God does want me to pass my exams too. Final year le!
Many things i wanna do, yet little time.
New environment, new excitement, yet always half hearted attempts, especially at fellowshipping. I mean how is it possible to fellowship when once u reach home slightly later u'd b scrutinised and be asked for thousand and one explanations.
But yups, not complaining. cos I'm treasuring every moment that i can spend in church.
God's grace!
And was encouraged by a newfound fren at the sat svc. He's Ga. Ga says after 5 yrs, his parents are finally removing idols at home and more receptive to his faith. Even asked him to pray for his grandma. Encouraged!
One day... one day... i have faith that one day will come! :P
Hmmph just taking a short break from studying about syncope haha. Hope i dun syncope this wk.... night calls on tues & sat!!! well at least its better than JL. Calls on thurs then sat again. And compared to my HO who had like almost 3 calls within 1 wk, im really lucky haha but still....
haha but yups the best medicine post call is actually gg to church! Did tt for my prev 2 calls. Was more refreshed and more awakened!
drawing strength from the Lord! :P
Yet, once again (same as for Uganda), to me, the highlight of these 4 wks is non-medical. I don't deny that being thrown into the wards acting as a house officer has been an immense change, have learnt stuff that i've never learnt before. BUT what has been greater is the spiritual growth that I've been having ever since i started to be able to go to church.
Breath-taking, amazing, awe-ful are just some words that can describe a small proportion of the whole experience. Nowadays, if i don't go church on sundays, there seems to be something missing from me. Due to work commitments, i'd go for saturday service, yet it doesnt feel the same.
Hmmm maybe i shouldn't call it spiritual growth / maturity yet. Cos true maturity is when the your life is transformed. When the character of Jesus manifests in us. So yes, i still do admit my transformation is kinda slow. But the spiritual experience is really amazing.
Sometimes i just have this chong1 dong4 to put down everything on my hands and hide in some corner and just read His word, spend time with Him and fellowshipping with others. Yet, i know, God does want me to pass my exams too. Final year le!
Many things i wanna do, yet little time.
New environment, new excitement, yet always half hearted attempts, especially at fellowshipping. I mean how is it possible to fellowship when once u reach home slightly later u'd b scrutinised and be asked for thousand and one explanations.
But yups, not complaining. cos I'm treasuring every moment that i can spend in church.
God's grace!
And was encouraged by a newfound fren at the sat svc. He's Ga. Ga says after 5 yrs, his parents are finally removing idols at home and more receptive to his faith. Even asked him to pray for his grandma. Encouraged!
One day... one day... i have faith that one day will come! :P
Hmmph just taking a short break from studying about syncope haha. Hope i dun syncope this wk.... night calls on tues & sat!!! well at least its better than JL. Calls on thurs then sat again. And compared to my HO who had like almost 3 calls within 1 wk, im really lucky haha but still....
haha but yups the best medicine post call is actually gg to church! Did tt for my prev 2 calls. Was more refreshed and more awakened!
drawing strength from the Lord! :P
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Finding Faith
Some videos on this topic. Hmmm shall talk about my own story later...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UnFB0vYeemY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Euwgc-ZggHA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ZdM6pGn7rw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9C0BI1MvDs&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUXm-nKR2DY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UnFB0vYeemY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Euwgc-ZggHA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ZdM6pGn7rw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9C0BI1MvDs&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUXm-nKR2DY
Monday, June 30, 2008
Hmmm
ha one of the reasons why i kept this blog to myself previously cos i merely wanted something like a diary, just to write what my thoughts, my feelings are, etc. Ha but now... hmmm...
Erhm. Think quite a few people asked me what happened after my previous post. Hmmm. NOTHING HAPPENED. ha not unhappy or troubled or what. Well, guess its my English again. SiGh! SO DUN WORRY K!
was just recounting an event (erhm 3 yrs ago?) which i was really helpless, but now my prayers have been answered. So yes, it is a sweet feeling, a testimony of God working in my life. I have seen how faithful God has been. I am always amazed by God, by what He has done. I stand in awe of Him. The feeling He gives me in a Chinese phrase is: 奇妙. Miraculous! That's how it feels like. its the 'wow' feeling!
So even though i know not what challenges i'd be facing in future, i know i can trust in Him, no matter what. I am just hoping to grow in my faith, become more mature, rather than still remaining as a spiritual babe!
Someone used the word "staunch" on me. NO. I don't think you can use that to describe me. I'd feel ashamed. But yes, this word is what i'd be working towards. BUT you know, this word gives me creeps. Cos "staunch" sounds more religious - like doing things just for the sake of doing, for the sake of religion, which should not be the case. It is all about relationship with God. Not just merely a human effort in seeking Him.
Someone else used the word "filial" on me. NO. Don't think you can use that to describe me too. Whatever i try to do, i'm just doing what i think every reasonable son / daughter should do. In fact, i'm still not doing a good job. We need to honour our parents. We have to consider their feelings and perspective in every thing that we do. And I am particularly aware of that fine line that I will cross if i don't handle these delicately.
Matthew 5:16 "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven." Was just searching for "proselytizing in hospitals" after my church friend (ha erhm i guess im more popular with the aunties still, sigh) cut out news article from "my paper" talking about evangelism in hospitals. (cos evangelising in hospitals yielded no results) Didn't manage to find the article, but came across blogs written by atheists etc. Hmmm realised (wrong word used, cos i sorta know, but gained a better understanding) that there seems to be alot of anger (yes, the comments were really foul and vulgar) triggered off by street evangelists, doctors, teachers etc who talks about their own faith, especially while working. So yes, there is a fine line which we must delicately handle, yes, if not there will only be more repulsion than anything. Definitely i don't think things like after telling a patient you have cancer one moment and then you tell them to consider Christianity the next moment is ethical. This is simply unacceptable and insensitive towards the patient lah!
It takes 2 hands to clap. If only 1 hand is used, it becomes a slap! So if you slap someone, surely that someone will become angry rite? So can understand why they are feeling like this.
One of the things I have learnt in Uganda is that you do not have to say things like this or what to people around you. Matthew 5:16 simply means that we should live a biblical life in every aspect - work, family, play - such that others can see a change / difference in us. NOT trying to "proselytize" in this aspect. And God's ministry will follow you when you do that. YUPS It's all about God, not about us. It is not "us" that converts someone but God is the one.
And it is NOT that we want to convert others that so we live a biblical life! It is all out of love, for God. It is all out of love that He sends Jesus to saves us. The big topic is really, love. It may be out of love for your patients / people around you that you might do silly things like that mentioned above. but i guess, respecting them for what and who they are is a means of love too.
So yups, all along, i try to respect others' beliefs etc so i usually will talk about it when others broach a subject or are really interested. I guess that will continue to be what I am.
Yet, sometimes when i feel that it is the Holy Spirit asking me to speak, then I will. And yes, He speaks through me. He speaks through people. (erhms no this is not getting possessed or what, so ppl, pls dun get the wrong idea and get scared of me haha different different. oops dun wanna yue4 miao2 yue4 hei1. wateva...)
anyway, this post is just a comment... Nth much. hope i really have not offended many people by saying so much. sorry sorry k.
:P
well as you can see, when i try to put all my thoughts quickly down in writing it becomes an unorganised piece of crap like this. haha oh wells. hope i didnt confuse anyone.
bleah.
Erhm. Think quite a few people asked me what happened after my previous post. Hmmm. NOTHING HAPPENED. ha not unhappy or troubled or what. Well, guess its my English again. SiGh! SO DUN WORRY K!
was just recounting an event (erhm 3 yrs ago?) which i was really helpless, but now my prayers have been answered. So yes, it is a sweet feeling, a testimony of God working in my life. I have seen how faithful God has been. I am always amazed by God, by what He has done. I stand in awe of Him. The feeling He gives me in a Chinese phrase is: 奇妙. Miraculous! That's how it feels like. its the 'wow' feeling!
So even though i know not what challenges i'd be facing in future, i know i can trust in Him, no matter what. I am just hoping to grow in my faith, become more mature, rather than still remaining as a spiritual babe!
Someone used the word "staunch" on me. NO. I don't think you can use that to describe me. I'd feel ashamed. But yes, this word is what i'd be working towards. BUT you know, this word gives me creeps. Cos "staunch" sounds more religious - like doing things just for the sake of doing, for the sake of religion, which should not be the case. It is all about relationship with God. Not just merely a human effort in seeking Him.
Someone else used the word "filial" on me. NO. Don't think you can use that to describe me too. Whatever i try to do, i'm just doing what i think every reasonable son / daughter should do. In fact, i'm still not doing a good job. We need to honour our parents. We have to consider their feelings and perspective in every thing that we do. And I am particularly aware of that fine line that I will cross if i don't handle these delicately.
Matthew 5:16 "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven." Was just searching for "proselytizing in hospitals" after my church friend (ha erhm i guess im more popular with the aunties still, sigh) cut out news article from "my paper" talking about evangelism in hospitals. (cos evangelising in hospitals yielded no results) Didn't manage to find the article, but came across blogs written by atheists etc. Hmmm realised (wrong word used, cos i sorta know, but gained a better understanding) that there seems to be alot of anger (yes, the comments were really foul and vulgar) triggered off by street evangelists, doctors, teachers etc who talks about their own faith, especially while working. So yes, there is a fine line which we must delicately handle, yes, if not there will only be more repulsion than anything. Definitely i don't think things like after telling a patient you have cancer one moment and then you tell them to consider Christianity the next moment is ethical. This is simply unacceptable and insensitive towards the patient lah!
It takes 2 hands to clap. If only 1 hand is used, it becomes a slap! So if you slap someone, surely that someone will become angry rite? So can understand why they are feeling like this.
One of the things I have learnt in Uganda is that you do not have to say things like this or what to people around you. Matthew 5:16 simply means that we should live a biblical life in every aspect - work, family, play - such that others can see a change / difference in us. NOT trying to "proselytize" in this aspect. And God's ministry will follow you when you do that. YUPS It's all about God, not about us. It is not "us" that converts someone but God is the one.
And it is NOT that we want to convert others that so we live a biblical life! It is all out of love, for God. It is all out of love that He sends Jesus to saves us. The big topic is really, love. It may be out of love for your patients / people around you that you might do silly things like that mentioned above. but i guess, respecting them for what and who they are is a means of love too.
So yups, all along, i try to respect others' beliefs etc so i usually will talk about it when others broach a subject or are really interested. I guess that will continue to be what I am.
Yet, sometimes when i feel that it is the Holy Spirit asking me to speak, then I will. And yes, He speaks through me. He speaks through people. (erhms no this is not getting possessed or what, so ppl, pls dun get the wrong idea and get scared of me haha different different. oops dun wanna yue4 miao2 yue4 hei1. wateva...)
anyway, this post is just a comment... Nth much. hope i really have not offended many people by saying so much. sorry sorry k.
:P
well as you can see, when i try to put all my thoughts quickly down in writing it becomes an unorganised piece of crap like this. haha oh wells. hope i didnt confuse anyone.
bleah.
Friday, June 27, 2008
I can still remember that day. I was helpless. My heart just sank. It just felt terrible, terrible, terrible. When what's up against you are the dearest people around you. I felt trapped. I was heartbroken. I cried. I cried to the Lord...
Today, I listened to this song. Memories of that day came up. Yet, the feeling today... is sweet...
Casting crowns always have a way of touching the chord in my heart...
I reflected upon that day. Today, i can only say... GOD IS FAITHFUL! It is times like this that you render yourself completely to Him, am awed by Him.
And I know there are many out there who has prayed for me. Thank you all.
All throughout these years, God has sent many people to pull me along...
Casting crowns has another song, which fully describes what I am feeling right now. I just want to live a life worthy of Him.
I know not what lies ahead. This year and beyond. But it is during such times of reflection that one is reminded of the simple fact. God is in control. (And yes, there is another by this title too! Love it! Think i've posted the lyrics before.)
All in all, :P
Today, I listened to this song. Memories of that day came up. Yet, the feeling today... is sweet...
_________________________________________________________________________
Praise You in this Storm
I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining
As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away
And I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to you
And you raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You
But as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth
___________________________________________________________________
Praise You in this Storm
I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining
As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away
And I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to you
And you raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You
But as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth
___________________________________________________________________
Casting crowns always have a way of touching the chord in my heart...
I reflected upon that day. Today, i can only say... GOD IS FAITHFUL! It is times like this that you render yourself completely to Him, am awed by Him.
And I know there are many out there who has prayed for me. Thank you all.
All throughout these years, God has sent many people to pull me along...
Casting crowns has another song, which fully describes what I am feeling right now. I just want to live a life worthy of Him.
____________________________________________________________________
Lifesong
Empty hands held high
Such small sacrifice
If not joined with my life
I sing in vain tonight
May the words I say
And the things I do
Make my lifesong sing
Bring a smile to You
Let my lifesong sing to You
Let my lifesong sing to You
I want to sign Your name to the end of this day
Knowing that my heart was true
Let my lifesong sing to You
Lord I give my life
A living sacrifice
To reach a world in need
To be Your hands and feet
So may the words I say
And the things I do
Make my lifesong sing
Bring a smile to You
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Let my lifesong sing to You
____________________________________________________________________
I know not what lies ahead. This year and beyond. But it is during such times of reflection that one is reminded of the simple fact. God is in control. (And yes, there is another by this title too! Love it! Think i've posted the lyrics before.)
All in all, :P
Thursday, June 26, 2008
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
Time to give myself a hard knock...
Wake up!
KNOCK 1
I read through my previous posts. Realized how my English has deteriorated, how it has morphed to Singlish, even when i write. Fortunately there are no "General Paper" Exams in University. Given this standard of English I am having now, I will not be surprised that the tutor marking my scrip will not understand what I am writing! Sigh.
KNOCK 2
I desperately need to "wake up my idea" (yes, one of the famous army phrase. Typical Singlish.) I need to really get serious and study harder, study faster! Final Year already! Go off, television! Run away from me, computer games! Mr Sloth, roll into the sea! Mr Smarty, I need you!!!!!
KNOCK 3
Of late, my strabismus is acting up... Spending too much time in front of the computer? Wrong lens? Tired from studying? I better knock that eye back, before it rolls away. Like Master, like eye. Both are lazy.
FOCUS FOCUS FOCUS!
Wake up!
KNOCK 1
I read through my previous posts. Realized how my English has deteriorated, how it has morphed to Singlish, even when i write. Fortunately there are no "General Paper" Exams in University. Given this standard of English I am having now, I will not be surprised that the tutor marking my scrip will not understand what I am writing! Sigh.
KNOCK 2
I desperately need to "wake up my idea" (yes, one of the famous army phrase. Typical Singlish.) I need to really get serious and study harder, study faster! Final Year already! Go off, television! Run away from me, computer games! Mr Sloth, roll into the sea! Mr Smarty, I need you!!!!!
KNOCK 3
Of late, my strabismus is acting up... Spending too much time in front of the computer? Wrong lens? Tired from studying? I better knock that eye back, before it rolls away. Like Master, like eye. Both are lazy.
FOCUS FOCUS FOCUS!
Monday, June 23, 2008
Amazed
Why are there 4 gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, John) in the bible? Each of them talks about similar things, yet each of them are different. Shall not go into the details of how each of these are different, but just want to share what I have learnt.
"Gospel" comes from Anglo-Saxon words "god" meaning good and "spell" meaning tidings or history. So all 4 talks about the life of Jesus. Yet all 4 have a different focus.
In Matthew, He is portrayed as the King.
In Mark, He is portrayed as the servant.
In Luke, He is portrayed as the Son of Man, a perfect Man
In John, He is portrayed as the Son of God.
In the same way, the prophets have described Him, before His coming:
King – Psalm 72, Isaiah 9:6-7; 32:1; Jeremiah 23:5; Zechariah 9:9, 14:9
Servant of Jehovah: Isaiah 42:1-7; 52:13-15; 53.
Man, Son of Man: Genesis 3:15, 22:18, Isaiah 7:14-16; 9:6
God: Isaiah 9:6; 40:3-5, 47:4; Jeremiah 23:6
The 4 gospels were written at different times, but different people. Yet, it is amazing how each of them wrote with a different focus of Jesus and non repeating but in the exact same 4 ways He has been described by the prophets. Hmmm coincidence? I don't think so. In mathematical terms, the probability of that is o.25^4, giving us 0.39% chance. Ha still many people will think this is still quite a large probability.
Haha but anyway, just a trivia. Went to search on when the gospels were written. Sieved through many long essays, but managed to find a summary in the end: Matthew about 36; Mark about 40; Luke about 54; John about 93 AD Ha interesting! Other sources mention other years. Anyway, if anyone's interested in reading something about the gospels, go to http://www.ichthus.info/CaseForChrist/01/intro.html its quite a short but interesting read.. for time-pressed people like me!
Ever so amazed by God!
:P
P/S: (anyway, i know of people out there who'd not agree to what i've just written but i have to claim that all these are but my own opinion! No malice intended to anyone!)
"Gospel" comes from Anglo-Saxon words "god" meaning good and "spell" meaning tidings or history. So all 4 talks about the life of Jesus. Yet all 4 have a different focus.
In Matthew, He is portrayed as the King.
In Mark, He is portrayed as the servant.
In Luke, He is portrayed as the Son of Man, a perfect Man
In John, He is portrayed as the Son of God.
In the same way, the prophets have described Him, before His coming:
King – Psalm 72, Isaiah 9:6-7; 32:1; Jeremiah 23:5; Zechariah 9:9, 14:9
Servant of Jehovah: Isaiah 42:1-7; 52:13-15; 53.
Man, Son of Man: Genesis 3:15, 22:18, Isaiah 7:14-16; 9:6
God: Isaiah 9:6; 40:3-5, 47:4; Jeremiah 23:6
The 4 gospels were written at different times, but different people. Yet, it is amazing how each of them wrote with a different focus of Jesus and non repeating but in the exact same 4 ways He has been described by the prophets. Hmmm coincidence? I don't think so. In mathematical terms, the probability of that is o.25^4, giving us 0.39% chance. Ha still many people will think this is still quite a large probability.
Haha but anyway, just a trivia. Went to search on when the gospels were written. Sieved through many long essays, but managed to find a summary in the end: Matthew about 36; Mark about 40; Luke about 54; John about 93 AD Ha interesting! Other sources mention other years. Anyway, if anyone's interested in reading something about the gospels, go to http://www.ichthus.info/CaseForChrist/01/intro.html its quite a short but interesting read.. for time-pressed people like me!
Ever so amazed by God!
:P
P/S: (anyway, i know of people out there who'd not agree to what i've just written but i have to claim that all these are but my own opinion! No malice intended to anyone!)
Saturday, May 24, 2008
10th - one more photo
oh my one more photo! which i like very much! thanks to JL! this is evidence of us sitting on the boda boda to Kasubi tombs. ha 3 of us on a motorbike. interesting hahaha yups but you have to pay for 2 people la! heh not one
oh anw just read JL's blog and found tt my english is so bad! at least for these hurried posts. just rattle off my mind. not writing composition heh. So yups. for a better blog entries on Uganda adventure, go to her blog heh
oh anw just read JL's blog and found tt my english is so bad! at least for these hurried posts. just rattle off my mind. not writing composition heh. So yups. for a better blog entries on Uganda adventure, go to her blog heh
10th - Photos of Outreach
The boatman. ha nice photo rite! He's real steady la, can walk from the front of the boat to the back just by balancing on the edge. No handles nothing la!
This is the boat that we boarded. hahhaha. really looks like sampan type rite. er but perhaps cant see very well but yes, this is already at the village, when we're going back le.
On board the boat.... heh behind me is the korean pastor and im sitting with the korean elder... hahahha the way he behaves everything is just like the Typical Korean man on tv!!!! my tv drama come alive. cham suddenly there's a korean wave in me hahaha they're really nice and very cute!
this was taken on our way back. The pastor wanted to take me with the sunset. but yups, wasn't successful la but nvm still nice hahaha
and yups this is the sunset. really nice rite? haha not postcard ok, i took this! there's the korean elder's hair at the right bottom corner hahaha. am proud of this photo! and yes i love the sunset. first time see sunset in africa haha so nice!!!
And here's me emulating the scarecrow amid the maize plantation. Ha erhm didnt get to take the photo of the real scarecrow which they put up.
and these are the maize plants
then this is the village. hahaha this is REAL not the fake ones we took at the museum...
and the village houses... ha dun mind living there ne!
and here's the health centre. and all of us, except the korean pastor, who is taking the photo.
we had lunch first before even working. here's the korean meal prepared by the korean elder! KIMCHI!!! ha didnt know he can cook... cos all the ones in the show all dun cook hahahaha and his Lugandan is so powerful! can crack jokes in Luganda... only cant communicate with me in English :( minimal la
and here's the 3 of them from left to right. Elder, pastor, Dr L. They're real nice ppl real glad to have gotten to know them.
Waterfront housing... in the developed world, people pay to live like that. Here, they have everything. ha was on the boat with this US paramedical lady, the pastor offered her sushi and she commented that in US, people pay to eat and enjoy the view on the lake, and here she's eating and having panoramic view and its free! ha you gain some you lose some isnt it?
And here's the view from the boat of the hilly areas surrounding lake victoria. Lake victoria is so big! hahaha there's bilharzia in lake victoria!!!!! haha otherwise i would have jumped into the clean and cool water!
haha and now ending off my photo post with the korean boy! so cute! heh he's 2 plus going to 3 this year. he really loves to play and he is really hyperactive! ha but dun tink is ADHD hahaha kk
so are the photos nice? do feedback! ha may not be posting much more... see if have time cos we'd be on the go from monday onwards! hehehe exciting weekS ahead hahahaha take care folks, am enjoying myself!
This is the boat that we boarded. hahhaha. really looks like sampan type rite. er but perhaps cant see very well but yes, this is already at the village, when we're going back le.
On board the boat.... heh behind me is the korean pastor and im sitting with the korean elder... hahahha the way he behaves everything is just like the Typical Korean man on tv!!!! my tv drama come alive. cham suddenly there's a korean wave in me hahaha they're really nice and very cute!
this was taken on our way back. The pastor wanted to take me with the sunset. but yups, wasn't successful la but nvm still nice hahaha
and yups this is the sunset. really nice rite? haha not postcard ok, i took this! there's the korean elder's hair at the right bottom corner hahaha. am proud of this photo! and yes i love the sunset. first time see sunset in africa haha so nice!!!
And here's me emulating the scarecrow amid the maize plantation. Ha erhm didnt get to take the photo of the real scarecrow which they put up.
and these are the maize plants
then this is the village. hahaha this is REAL not the fake ones we took at the museum...
and the village houses... ha dun mind living there ne!
and here's the health centre. and all of us, except the korean pastor, who is taking the photo.
we had lunch first before even working. here's the korean meal prepared by the korean elder! KIMCHI!!! ha didnt know he can cook... cos all the ones in the show all dun cook hahahaha and his Lugandan is so powerful! can crack jokes in Luganda... only cant communicate with me in English :( minimal la
and here's the 3 of them from left to right. Elder, pastor, Dr L. They're real nice ppl real glad to have gotten to know them.
Waterfront housing... in the developed world, people pay to live like that. Here, they have everything. ha was on the boat with this US paramedical lady, the pastor offered her sushi and she commented that in US, people pay to eat and enjoy the view on the lake, and here she's eating and having panoramic view and its free! ha you gain some you lose some isnt it?
And here's the view from the boat of the hilly areas surrounding lake victoria. Lake victoria is so big! hahaha there's bilharzia in lake victoria!!!!! haha otherwise i would have jumped into the clean and cool water!
haha and now ending off my photo post with the korean boy! so cute! heh he's 2 plus going to 3 this year. he really loves to play and he is really hyperactive! ha but dun tink is ADHD hahaha kk
so are the photos nice? do feedback! ha may not be posting much more... see if have time cos we'd be on the go from monday onwards! hehehe exciting weekS ahead hahahaha take care folks, am enjoying myself!
10th
Back in Kampala, Edge House! Ha only after you’ve gone for the rural rotation then you’d appreciate the things which you took for granted. Luckily we decided to go for the rural rotation last instead of first, so we were exposed to a more of Uganda as the time went by and so there was no cultural shock. Ha.but yes, would have loved the opportunity to stay in the village. But we were only there for one day, for outreach.
So yes, the highlight of the week that has passed was that we took the Monday off to go outreach with the Korean missionary, called Missionary L. Ha but I preferred to call him Dr Lim. We went to this ? island (not sure if it has a name ha) in the middle of Lake Victoria for outreach. Apparently, Dr Lim has already been to this village for a few times to provide free medical care, often going with the Korean church. So on this trip there was Korean pastor, Korean elder, Korean Dr, Singaporean students, Ugandans (1 intern, 2 University Bible Fellowship people) all on the trip! Ha it was a wonderful experience. Shall describe what we’ve done later…
SUNDAY
so yups before using internet, had a great lunch at this place called Javas. Ha is atas restaurant. So yups here's the pic:
Cappuccino
and i ate this char grilled lamb! so nice
This is in stark contrast to the local food i eat everyday (ha the samosas in the background is already a luxury) and yes greens is a luxury
And yups, so shall show you where i've been to these 2 weeks. nice photo by JL's panoramic function on camera. Mine does not have. hahahha Wakiso health centre at busiro east district
After we left the internet cafĂ©, we decided to go back to Edge House. On our way back we saw the sign for the museum in the University. So finally we’re going to the museum! hahaha Why finally? cos during our stay in the university, we wanted to go there, but could not find it and missed the exhibition! It was deemed by the Bradt guidebook as an attraction ha but we asked around and apparently the students there do not know it exists! ha. Hmmm but when we went there we were a tad too late, cos it closed 15 mins earlier. Sigh but there were many nice exhibits around there, presumably all by their school of fine arts students. So yups, we took many photos!
and
Later, on the pretext of giving photos, we sneaked back to Edge House to take a bath at our nice nice toilet. there was no one so we sneaked back in hahahaha it was real fun! Ha and we felt clean. WOW!
we stayed over at the Dr L’s house. We had a very very full dinner. Nice traditional Korean food!!! There was this ____ (erhm, I conveniently forgot the name, was busy eating… heh mabbe look at JL’s blog she’d have it) where you wrap the lettuce with bean sauce and stewed beef! *slurp* so nice! Then there was the traditional soup, used chopsticks and spoons (first time in Uganda) that look like the ones in Da Chang Jin (the Korean drama) and lotsa greens and late lotsa raw green chilli!! Miss them so much! ha show you the photo ah..
Then helped prepare the medical supplies, looked around in his clinic, slept in their children’s room, cos 2 of their 3 children are in Kenya, studying at an International School for missionaries’ children. Hmmm Interestingly, their 3rd son is more African then Korean! Ha he prefers African food more than Korean (hmmm, bad choice my dear… Korean food has chilli which is so so nice!!!!)
We set off at 6.30am, driving to Jinja for about 1plus hr (yes, where we’re planning to go, probably white water rafting?) then boarded a BOAT haha like sampan, but there’s motor and cruised Lake Victoria for 2 plus hours. Throughout the trip I did not sleep much cos I was busy taking photos of the nice nice scenery! Heh and yes, on the way back caught a nice nice sunset.
Ha yups, and the village was really interesting, it was like those village houses we saw at the museum come alive! Ha, took some photos. Didn’t see much patients, cos we were in charge of the dispensary, which was what we did in Batam. ha really think God made all the experiences for a reason.
The village was my idea of rural medicine! Ha the fields full of crops, village houses built from straw and mud and wood, no electricity, some water, no toilets… (well there is! army style heh) Was quite high when I went there. Won’t mind if I could stay there. ha the environment was so nice, the air was fresh! Lotsa maize etc. Really enjoyed myself.
Hmmm no preaching or giving out of bibles, but yes, I loved it. And definitely, Dr L is really admirable. He was the one who helped build the health centre where we worked at. yes, albeit just a small single storey house with say 3 rooms, it was already the most modern building there. There was bricks and cement. (yes, he transported more cement on our trip there). He started building this since years ago. Currently, according to him, there is a nurse who works there. And all the medical supplies and the building? Built from his own salary from his clinic in UBF. And he charges each consultation only 10000 shillings (like 9 plus SGD) each patient, half of what the other specialists in Uganda charges, albeit having attained a PhD in paediatrics. wow. And you can see how the villagers respected him. Prepared a meal, helped with all the carrying (the cement, medical supplies and all) and lotsa maize as souvenirs.
The return journey was a stormy one. Ha so they had to get us life jackets, but yups, the boat was swaying in full force, cos the waves were huge and the boat was just a sampan ha. But it was an interesting experience. And yes, was they were in full confidence that we can sail. Ha reminds me of the scene where Jesus and His disciples were on the sea. Ha. Dunno why, but had peace in my heart even though the boat was swaying. Just having confidence in Him.
Yet, I know I have failed Him, always falling short, yielding to temptation and sin. Sigh. but no, will try my best, yes try my best to live a life that He wants me to. Free from bondage. Free. But yes, my actions have shown that He is still not my first and foremost priority in life, which is bad! Sigh. I am still more self loving than God loving. Hmmm change, change change! Naughty boy must become good boy! Ha.
Hmmm yups, looking at these missionaries, there is something that tugs my heart. And yes, such is the faith of the missionaries. Asked the pastor why Uganda? He just shrugs and point up there. Am awed by the faith. Am hoping that my faith is like that. Will I be like that?
Food for thought.
Anyway, the rest of the week was mundane hahaha cos it’s just running clinics on our own. Just like GPs, and lotsa question marks cos like 80% speak Luganda, so if we do not have a translator, its CHAM.
Ha yups, back at Edge house, really comfortable, at least there is running water. Has not stopped. And throughout these 2 months, it really struck me that if there was any natural disasters around in the world near Singapore, Singapore will just go downhill from our current state. Why? Cos we depend much on others for food, unlike like Uganda, where if the whole world is having war, they’d still survive, cos they live very basically. Water from the lakes, food etc all local produce. Hmmm, so many Singaporean students (heh me lah) have been taught in geography classes etc that we are well protected from all the natural disasters. True, but you never know how the world can change. And we are not immune. Any earth quake that strikes the water pipes from Indonesia or bird flu hitting the region we’d be out of water, or food. How to survive? Hmmm I’m sure our leaders have contingency plans. Ha, if not, they better start planning! Ha seeing Myanmar and China, we know more disasters are to come… but yes, we place our confidence in Him.
Have not cooked any meals for the past 2 weeks. Ha feel very unhealthy always having to eat out, so yups, will cook some lunch today! muhahahaha my fave hobby!
But yes, will try to post some more photos!
NEXT WEEK – FUNFILLED WEEK AHEAD!
So having completed the serious business that is all the medical studies in Uganda, we are now back to the fun business! Ha am so looking forward to touring to Uganda. So here’s our plan:
Monday – Lesster and us drive off to Kabale, Kisiizi hospital to pick up the other 4 students. We’re staying there for the night to see what their life is like.
Tuesday, - leave Kisiizi, to Queen Elizabeth Park! We’re staying at a resort and L’s fren is there so we get special price!
Wednesday – Game drive
Thurs – bee farm, bat caves etc
Fri, Sat – Jinja ? White water rafting? hahahaha
Sun – Kampala. Cornerstone church?
Mon, Tues – Entebbe, fly to HK
Wed – reach HK in the evening.
Thurs – Start HK tour… shall look at the itinery my fren planned for us!!!! muhahahaha!
kk gg to cook now!!!! hungry!!!!
_________
look at the next post for the village photos! :P
So yes, the highlight of the week that has passed was that we took the Monday off to go outreach with the Korean missionary, called Missionary L. Ha but I preferred to call him Dr Lim. We went to this ? island (not sure if it has a name ha) in the middle of Lake Victoria for outreach. Apparently, Dr Lim has already been to this village for a few times to provide free medical care, often going with the Korean church. So on this trip there was Korean pastor, Korean elder, Korean Dr, Singaporean students, Ugandans (1 intern, 2 University Bible Fellowship people) all on the trip! Ha it was a wonderful experience. Shall describe what we’ve done later…
SUNDAY
so yups before using internet, had a great lunch at this place called Javas. Ha is atas restaurant. So yups here's the pic:
Cappuccino
and i ate this char grilled lamb! so nice
This is in stark contrast to the local food i eat everyday (ha the samosas in the background is already a luxury) and yes greens is a luxury
And yups, so shall show you where i've been to these 2 weeks. nice photo by JL's panoramic function on camera. Mine does not have. hahahha Wakiso health centre at busiro east district
After we left the internet cafĂ©, we decided to go back to Edge House. On our way back we saw the sign for the museum in the University. So finally we’re going to the museum! hahaha Why finally? cos during our stay in the university, we wanted to go there, but could not find it and missed the exhibition! It was deemed by the Bradt guidebook as an attraction ha but we asked around and apparently the students there do not know it exists! ha. Hmmm but when we went there we were a tad too late, cos it closed 15 mins earlier. Sigh but there were many nice exhibits around there, presumably all by their school of fine arts students. So yups, we took many photos!
and
Later, on the pretext of giving photos, we sneaked back to Edge House to take a bath at our nice nice toilet. there was no one so we sneaked back in hahahaha it was real fun! Ha and we felt clean. WOW!
we stayed over at the Dr L’s house. We had a very very full dinner. Nice traditional Korean food!!! There was this ____ (erhm, I conveniently forgot the name, was busy eating… heh mabbe look at JL’s blog she’d have it) where you wrap the lettuce with bean sauce and stewed beef! *slurp* so nice! Then there was the traditional soup, used chopsticks and spoons (first time in Uganda) that look like the ones in Da Chang Jin (the Korean drama) and lotsa greens and late lotsa raw green chilli!! Miss them so much! ha show you the photo ah..
Then helped prepare the medical supplies, looked around in his clinic, slept in their children’s room, cos 2 of their 3 children are in Kenya, studying at an International School for missionaries’ children. Hmmm Interestingly, their 3rd son is more African then Korean! Ha he prefers African food more than Korean (hmmm, bad choice my dear… Korean food has chilli which is so so nice!!!!)
We set off at 6.30am, driving to Jinja for about 1plus hr (yes, where we’re planning to go, probably white water rafting?) then boarded a BOAT haha like sampan, but there’s motor and cruised Lake Victoria for 2 plus hours. Throughout the trip I did not sleep much cos I was busy taking photos of the nice nice scenery! Heh and yes, on the way back caught a nice nice sunset.
Ha yups, and the village was really interesting, it was like those village houses we saw at the museum come alive! Ha, took some photos. Didn’t see much patients, cos we were in charge of the dispensary, which was what we did in Batam. ha really think God made all the experiences for a reason.
The village was my idea of rural medicine! Ha the fields full of crops, village houses built from straw and mud and wood, no electricity, some water, no toilets… (well there is! army style heh) Was quite high when I went there. Won’t mind if I could stay there. ha the environment was so nice, the air was fresh! Lotsa maize etc. Really enjoyed myself.
Hmmm no preaching or giving out of bibles, but yes, I loved it. And definitely, Dr L is really admirable. He was the one who helped build the health centre where we worked at. yes, albeit just a small single storey house with say 3 rooms, it was already the most modern building there. There was bricks and cement. (yes, he transported more cement on our trip there). He started building this since years ago. Currently, according to him, there is a nurse who works there. And all the medical supplies and the building? Built from his own salary from his clinic in UBF. And he charges each consultation only 10000 shillings (like 9 plus SGD) each patient, half of what the other specialists in Uganda charges, albeit having attained a PhD in paediatrics. wow. And you can see how the villagers respected him. Prepared a meal, helped with all the carrying (the cement, medical supplies and all) and lotsa maize as souvenirs.
The return journey was a stormy one. Ha so they had to get us life jackets, but yups, the boat was swaying in full force, cos the waves were huge and the boat was just a sampan ha. But it was an interesting experience. And yes, was they were in full confidence that we can sail. Ha reminds me of the scene where Jesus and His disciples were on the sea. Ha. Dunno why, but had peace in my heart even though the boat was swaying. Just having confidence in Him.
Yet, I know I have failed Him, always falling short, yielding to temptation and sin. Sigh. but no, will try my best, yes try my best to live a life that He wants me to. Free from bondage. Free. But yes, my actions have shown that He is still not my first and foremost priority in life, which is bad! Sigh. I am still more self loving than God loving. Hmmm change, change change! Naughty boy must become good boy! Ha.
Hmmm yups, looking at these missionaries, there is something that tugs my heart. And yes, such is the faith of the missionaries. Asked the pastor why Uganda? He just shrugs and point up there. Am awed by the faith. Am hoping that my faith is like that. Will I be like that?
Food for thought.
Anyway, the rest of the week was mundane hahaha cos it’s just running clinics on our own. Just like GPs, and lotsa question marks cos like 80% speak Luganda, so if we do not have a translator, its CHAM.
Ha yups, back at Edge house, really comfortable, at least there is running water. Has not stopped. And throughout these 2 months, it really struck me that if there was any natural disasters around in the world near Singapore, Singapore will just go downhill from our current state. Why? Cos we depend much on others for food, unlike like Uganda, where if the whole world is having war, they’d still survive, cos they live very basically. Water from the lakes, food etc all local produce. Hmmm, so many Singaporean students (heh me lah) have been taught in geography classes etc that we are well protected from all the natural disasters. True, but you never know how the world can change. And we are not immune. Any earth quake that strikes the water pipes from Indonesia or bird flu hitting the region we’d be out of water, or food. How to survive? Hmmm I’m sure our leaders have contingency plans. Ha, if not, they better start planning! Ha seeing Myanmar and China, we know more disasters are to come… but yes, we place our confidence in Him.
Have not cooked any meals for the past 2 weeks. Ha feel very unhealthy always having to eat out, so yups, will cook some lunch today! muhahahaha my fave hobby!
But yes, will try to post some more photos!
NEXT WEEK – FUNFILLED WEEK AHEAD!
So having completed the serious business that is all the medical studies in Uganda, we are now back to the fun business! Ha am so looking forward to touring to Uganda. So here’s our plan:
Monday – Lesster and us drive off to Kabale, Kisiizi hospital to pick up the other 4 students. We’re staying there for the night to see what their life is like.
Tuesday, - leave Kisiizi, to Queen Elizabeth Park! We’re staying at a resort and L’s fren is there so we get special price!
Wednesday – Game drive
Thurs – bee farm, bat caves etc
Fri, Sat – Jinja ? White water rafting? hahahaha
Sun – Kampala. Cornerstone church?
Mon, Tues – Entebbe, fly to HK
Wed – reach HK in the evening.
Thurs – Start HK tour… shall look at the itinery my fren planned for us!!!! muhahahaha!
kk gg to cook now!!!! hungry!!!!
_________
look at the next post for the village photos! :P
Sunday, May 18, 2008
9th
hahaha so glad i was able to post so many photos! *pleased w myself* heh heh heh nice photos rite? k here's the update i typed at my place of residence in Wakiso... went back to kampala to use internet... hahahaha sad rite.
______
hmmm since i still have about 25 mins shall blog abit more...
Must really admit that i can really be quite a dirty person... cos the past few days there has been no water (luckily we usually buy bottled water to drink, so drinking is really not a problem for us...), even resorted to collecting rainwater. BUT there has not been much rain too! hahahaha the locals have the habit of storing lots of water... that explains the malaria... but i guess you cant help it given such a system. They've spared one jerry can of water for us! haha but yups i didnt bathe la haha but i got those wipes haha so im still smelling good! not tt smelly
heh and i just realised that it is the finals of the american idol soon!!!! hahahaha hmmm heard that these 2 finalists are really good. hope to watch em! i think the younger david will win! hahaha he's so good la! must tape must tape!
heh kk gg off liaoz... gg to village tomorrow for outreach. guess it should be fun ne! take care folks, i'd be back!
______
This is my weekly update. Yes, it is exactly one week since I last have access to internet, as I am now physically back in Kampala, to settle some stuff and cos we are invited to dinner at the Korean missionary's home. They have also invited us to go on an outreach tomorrow, into the villages. It is definitely a new experience for me.
But indeed, the past week has been nothing short of interesting, in a different way. I am now doing my rural rotation in Wakiso Health Centre, in Busiro East district of Wakiso Town. We first arrived at the health centre on Monday afternoon, after a long wait for the driver from the university. This was something like a polyclinic, a mini hospital of sorts, for they have one doctor, who doesn't seem to see patients at all, as he is usually doing his administrative work. The main people seeing the patients are the clinical officers (they've got diploma in medicine, not doctors but something like paramedical staff) and the nurses. Here the nursing officers can prescribe. So we met the doctor in charge and of course, it was waiting for the health officer to bring us to the place of residence.
Here the accommodation is quite cheap, 10000 shillings per night, equivalent to less than SGD10. But disadvantage is that it is near a pub, so they're blasting music till 1.30am every night. (Ha, but yes, I've gotten use to all the noise in my place of residence at the university, so I can sleep despite all the noise, even when the light is on. Good training. Never used to be able to do that in Spore.) And the room here is much smaller than that which I've been staying for 5 wks. There is a small attached bathroom. But it is really really small. About slightly less than 1metre square.
Here things are more primitive. So yups, its quite rural. In Kampala, I get power failure once a week. But here, the power failure is almost everyday, then after certain time in the afternoon there is no water. At night there is not a single drop of water. So yups, they've provided jerry cans for us to store water. Interestingly, as this place has a pub, they have a backup generator. So we still have lights (if at night) when the power failure comes. Except the generator is just outside my room and they use petrol to run it so I smell it everyday. However, the light isn't fantastic. Can't really read with this light. Been using my torch and rechargeable batts ha.
So yups the main problem is with the water. Yesterday, there has been no water from the tap for more than 30 hrs ha luckily there was rain and they stored some water. So I've replenished one jerry can of water! That's all ha.
BUT no worries, people. I am fine with this living condition! ha sorta expected! Rural what! Ha this was what I wanted to experience so yups. And army has trained me well. I can choose not to bathe and still be clean! hahahahaha erps shan't go down to details. But heh interesting life here.
Eating out everyday, at the hawkers. Food here's cheaper, but the bottled water is more expensive than in kampala. But life here is really simple and interesting and slack. Cos I start seeing patients at 9 plus, then by 1plus 2 we're done and would be off for lunch and home!
Ha, yes, I get to run clinics here on our own. Not really confident at first but you soon get the hang of the things here. (erps must say it is really NOT good practice, but yups, we just do as they do here lor… can't really try much radical stuff) so got a feel of how it is like being a GP. But yes, the cases here are definitely much more interesting than GP in Spore sees. My first case was syphilis. Then hyperthyroidism. (the clinical officer gave me the ???WHAT??? look when I diagnosed hyperthyroidism. Think he'd have given some propanolol and reassurance and send the patient off.) Think: for somebody who was tachypnoeic, sick looking and not looking dehydrated, (I couldn't take any history cos of lang barrier, so I;m not sure what the patient told him) he took the blood pressure. It was 140/90 and he diagnosed it as hypertension. Treatment for this "hypertension" was IV fluids and observe. Firstly, the BP isn't all that high. It is just abit high. Then even if this was hypertension, the treatment wasn't IV fluids. And for her condition, I need to find out why she is so tachypneic and having some shortness of breath. I examined, chest was clear, everything else was fine. I couldn't take the history, so could find out no more.. So just had to agree to let the senior health officer treat it as hypertension and give IV fluids.
Many others… the first day I was full of ???? in my head. Ha but later recovered and yups, just did best what I could, using what little knowledge I have to help. At least, I saw patients with a stethoscope. The clinical officers didn't even use any. They just SEE patients. Don't even examine sometimes.
Ha feeling quite tired now, that's why this post does not seem coherent. Anyway, in SUMMARY: have adapted to the new environment pretty well and yups life is interesting!!! Looking forward to the outreach… and Kimchi!!! 4 more weeks and I'd be back!
________hmmm since i still have about 25 mins shall blog abit more...
Must really admit that i can really be quite a dirty person... cos the past few days there has been no water (luckily we usually buy bottled water to drink, so drinking is really not a problem for us...), even resorted to collecting rainwater. BUT there has not been much rain too! hahahaha the locals have the habit of storing lots of water... that explains the malaria... but i guess you cant help it given such a system. They've spared one jerry can of water for us! haha but yups i didnt bathe la haha but i got those wipes haha so im still smelling good! not tt smelly
heh and i just realised that it is the finals of the american idol soon!!!! hahahaha hmmm heard that these 2 finalists are really good. hope to watch em! i think the younger david will win! hahaha he's so good la! must tape must tape!
heh kk gg off liaoz... gg to village tomorrow for outreach. guess it should be fun ne! take care folks, i'd be back!
8th - yet yet more pics
On top of the ssezibwe rocks. yes we did some rock climbing to reach that high! hahahaha breath taking scenery!
yes, this is THAT CAT. THAT CAT that barged into my room when i opened the door and refused to go out! ha but as the days went by i must say i find it quite cute. just a tad different from the spore cats, albeit they look almost the same. they are NOT enticed by my hand signal for "food"! in spore if i do that, the cats will just come in my direction. BUT in here, this cat remained UNDER MY BED!
Ha there was this traditional dance troupe that performed at the guest house near our place of residence so yups, took a photo with them after their performance! Me holding some instrument which i'm not sure what it is hahaha
Well, thats the last photo i have uploaded! hahaha hope i can post more next week! Next week is an entirely exciting week!
yes, this is THAT CAT. THAT CAT that barged into my room when i opened the door and refused to go out! ha but as the days went by i must say i find it quite cute. just a tad different from the spore cats, albeit they look almost the same. they are NOT enticed by my hand signal for "food"! in spore if i do that, the cats will just come in my direction. BUT in here, this cat remained UNDER MY BED!
Ha there was this traditional dance troupe that performed at the guest house near our place of residence so yups, took a photo with them after their performance! Me holding some instrument which i'm not sure what it is hahaha
Well, thats the last photo i have uploaded! hahaha hope i can post more next week! Next week is an entirely exciting week!
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